Fools

         Well..i'm still standing, free from this inquisition which calls itself world..or civilization.I still hate all these new ways of living, and yes, i still need an escape from them, oh god how much i want the world to change, but how the hell am i supposed to go through with it? and you...you are like always so far away. There are nights when i can swear you are beside me, when all the discomfort goes away, when i know i'll go over everything, knowing that you''ll comfort me at the end of the day, but damn!...because when this comfort comes closer, then i open my eyes and see every fucking time, my half-opened window.I curse it because I’m thinking it is the one having the blame for your escape...i know it's stupid, but i need to blame something..

      Sometimes i think what if i chased you, letting you with no way out..showing how i really feel..but i couldn't do this, and maybe you couldn't wait for me to wake up..

      I remember now how calming your hand could be in times of trouble, and how holding it would made me a fearless warrior, facing all the childhood nightmares...all those night monsters disappeared instantly as my hand felt your touch, and i cannot shake all of these out from my head, i may not be ready or don't want to, but sure is hard having to live with an emptiness which i cannot fill..not now, not here.

       I'm tired...i don't know how many of you goes by seeing their dreams falling apart so often, or seeing that putting your faith in someone it's the biggest mistake.Life i believe it's a struggle to not be alone, because after all only a loved one can make everything easier, but how the fuck should i love someone? Which of these   empty, lying, manipulating, selfish and unstrustworthy souls i should choose? none! Being near to them makes me feel even worst. I am blocked between loneliness and being friend with someone i hate...not very good choices.

     Looking around i can see only monsters owning everything, and angels having to beg for a bread, begging for their own lives to the ones which without any remorse put them in that dark place.I think god made a very big mistake giving free will to some of us, cause all we do is, destroy and hate, even when we love, we unconsciously hate, so why i should hope for better days when i have none with whom i could share the joy, and why should i share my joy if the very next day you'll throw it away? I've learned that being very close with someone will bring you not happiness, but it will bring to you fear of not being disappointed again, because all we know to do is disappoint, so please don't judge me yelling out to you. Can't you see how this zombies got their hands on everything we used to love.Doesn't it bother you when they mock our way of life? Doesn't it bother you when these damn robots think they are better? and doesn't it bother you that they are making the rules of our lives?

     I should have the time of my life, but instead i need to swim in this garbage pool, having to clean myself everytime after i make contact with anybody, they're so damn dirty, lacking honour, lacking kindness and most important, lacking the ability to love somebody except themselves.I need another proof from you to show me you still exist, to show me we're not condemned to a life of struggle.I need you to show me again how easy it is, because i'm starting to forget our oath, i'm starting to lose my faith in this battle, and i need to see you and to feel your soul, because i'm so sick of these lying bitches moving around me, putting their claws deep in my back.I've experienced so many stories,with more than enough princesses turning in witches, but your fairytale couldn't be matched...