Killing me Softly..

What the hell do i want from me?? what do i think i will do in the rest of my life. Everything from now on seems like they are killing me softly, and if I think better, they realy are.Why? why could i not put my feet on the ground?Who is the one wich keeps me away from happiness, and why is it doing this?I believe that person must be me.Must be the way i am going on with my life, must be that lack of courage wich i am showing sometimes.Or that ego that i believe not in me.Sometimes i Know i am wrong, but maybe i am hoping not to feel such bad.Why can i have some many good things in my life and still feel so damn bad?Few far away things could make me happier now, and i believe i will never encounter those things, because i am scared, i am scared to do what it takes to find and obtain them.I am starting to know me, and sometimes i am scared of what i find there.I am scared because i ain’t good.Damn! I just want to know my purpose here, and once i know it to start feeling good, but i believe even after that i won’t be feeling better.I am very weak when it comes to those kind of things, that happiness wich all of us search it, and i dont wanna say that i will never find it, but sometimes i know i will never be happy, in that “soul meaning” of the word.I crushed in a life that drowns every bit of power whithin me, and i dont know a way out…i dont know i way to escape from it..i dont know how can i make what i want…

I’ll see you soon…